Thursday, July 16, 2009

Momfinitions

Twittermoms is having a little contest along with Parents Connect to create your own momfinitions- words and definitions that relate to moms. So, because I like contests and prizes and writing, I thought I would give it a go. Here are my five momfinitions-

1. Knimples  [nim - PULLS] noun: Dimples found on the knees of babies who sometimes over-indulge in milk drinking. An example of such a baby is pictured below. The lower picture shows a knimple.

Sentence- Your babies knimples are so cute!

2) Faceblogittermomitis [ face- blog- ITTER-mom-I-tis) noun: A disease that effects mothers who long for adult interaction. It involves obsession with social networking sites such at Facebook and Twitter as well as excessive checking of one's blog. There is no known cure at this time due to the relatively new onset of this condition.

Sentence- I don't know about that Karen, you know she suffers from faceblogittermomitis.

3) Stumbletasker [STUM- bull-task-ER] noun: This is a person, usually moms, who set out to do one task, but then stumble upon another. This is similar to a multi-tasker, but with much less intent and organization.

An example would be when one sets out to go fold the clothes in the dryer but on the way notices spilled juice on the floor. The stumbletasker would then forget the the original intent of the walk toward the dryer, abandon that task and instead head to the sink to get a rag for the juice. However, once said stumbletasker reached the sink, she then would notice the dishes in the sink and proceed to put them in the dishwasher and once said sink was emptied she would notice it needs to be scrubbed and then scrub it. At this point, she may decide it is time for a shower and the head in that direction. However, she then will stumble upon some clothes her children have left in the middle of the hallway. She will then walk to the laundry room and notice the juice again and so on. There is no way of knowing if the clothes in the dryer will ever get folded either that day or the next.

Sentence- It was unknown whether or not Penelope, an avid stumbletasker, would be able to get the dishes out of the dishwasher today.

4. Fragmomtation [FRAG-mom-tae-SHUN] noun: A way of speaking native to mothers that involves saying only half of a sentence. This is usually due to said mother trying to do and think about too many things at once while also trying to respond to an excessive amount of questions from her children. It might involve said mother's child asking, "Mom, can I have a juice." and the mother responding, "No, but you can have a..." leaving the child to have to decipher her fragmented answer. 

Sentence- Jen's fragmomtation had her children completely confused and they had no way of knowing whether or not it was okay for them to play outside or not.

5. Kidsponder [kid-SPAWN-der] noun: A child who has empathy for his mother's fragmomtation or merely wishes to get an answer out of her and attempts to assist her by supplying the rest of her sentences. If said mother responds, "No, but you can have a...", the kidsponder might say, "water?" 

sentence- That kidsponder must be a really bright child because he can finish all of his mother's sentences.

I hope that you have enjoyed my momfinitions. Please leave a comment! It is part of the contest.




32 comments:

parentingBYdummies said...

Impressive...these are really good. I thought about participating in this but guess I'm just not witty enough. Thanks for stopping by for my FB party today. You left some pretty nice comments, so thanks! Come back anytime:)

GypsyFox said...

your baby is oh so cute! love your Momfinitions!!!! :) just found your blog today & am now following it :)

Buddy and Krista said...

ha ha--very fun! I liked Stumbletasker the best, especially your LOOOONG stumbly explanation of it. Made me giggle. :)

Aubrey said...

Oh. My. GOSH.

This is the funniest post I have read in awhile! Thanks for the laugh!

denise said...

You crack me up! Your momfinitions are so, so true.

Anne Ericsson said...

I love your definitions and all of the laughter and tears you bring from your mamablogging (is that a word).
You have a gift in writing and making others feel normaL in such a chaotic time in history.

The Redhead Riter said...

Stopping by from SITS to say HI

That was really funny!

donahugh43 said...

Can't believe how BIG Vance is.I just love your blog.It's a sad day for me if you don't write a blog.Keeps me in touch.

Bullfrogs & Butterflies Baby said...

Stopping by via SITS. Love your Momfinitions! My youngest (3 months) has knimples and throlls (chubby little thigh rolls!)...though I don't know if she's overindulging or if I am...she's my last and I'm trying to savor my nursing time with her ;)

LeAnna said...

This was too cute! I love those baby knimples. :) Blog hopped my way here from Lemonade Makin' Mama. Loved your post titled Abundance, what a great reminder of what we have to be so thankful for.
Blessings,
LeAnna

Nancy said...

I love your momfinitions those are so creative and true. I definitely have seen these things in my life, especially the kidsponders of which I have 2, LOL

Lisa Petrarca said...

Love the momfinitions! SO TRUE! Happy Friday!!

FranticMommy said...

OMG! That's Fab! You forgot Momspursedrain-itis. It's the disease that afflicst your pocketbook evertime Mom's go to Toys R Us!

Little Nut Tree said...

Love those. Do you have to specify where the stress falls for the contest? (e.g. STUM-bull-TASK-er)

MammaMania said...

How hilarious. I am a huge STUMBLETASKER!!!! Loving your blog!

Dreamgirl said...

VERY FUNNY! I love your new words and plan to make them part of my vocabulary!

Found you through SITS and hope that you can visit me as well... I need some comment-loving too!

Have a wonderful day!

mommytoalot said...

LOL..
love this one ... Stumbletasker..so true.
stopping by from SITS

Courtney D said...

AT LAST!! A diagnosis! Seems I've been suffering from "faceblogittermomitis" for some time now! Too Cute!
Popping over from SITS!

Becky @ Our Sweet Peas said...

Very, very funny! HI from SITS!

Casey said...

Stopping by to say hi from SITS!

I loved them all! I think you did a great job, you had me laughing

MammaDucky said...

I'm a sucker for comment requests. Glad I am cuz these were pretty funny!

Barely Domestic Mama said...

Those were hilarious! Good luck with the contest.

Stopping by from SITS.

Keep It Classy, Jen said...

These are SUPER cute...my little kiddo can't talk yet but I have a feeling he is going to be a Kidsponder for sure!

shelley said...

hi brigetta,
stopping over from roll call, love to meet new friends! love your words, brings back many memories! (loved the photo's too!)stop by and say "hi" anytime!
hugs,
shelley
http://iamstillstandingafterallthistime.blogspot.com
http://theplaygroundprincess.blogspot.com

Lisa Anne said...

Saw your comment on todays SITS roll call, so I wanted to stop by. God Bless you, 4 boys, I can barely keep up with my 1 9 yr old boy. OMG. The things that come out of their mouths and the amount of food that goes in.

If you have time check out my blog I posted today, why a 9 yr old is not allowed to get a tattoo

Happy Friday!

http://smellthecoffeelisa.blogspot.com

Genny said...

Stopping by from SITS. Love your site. And I love the Knimples one in your list the best!

Mel Heth said...

Oh boy...I'm a stumbletasker now—heaven help me when I actually have children!

These were very cute, by the way.

Sarah said...

These are hilarious! And true! LOL!

Donna's Days said...

Knimples :)

Oh so yummy to kiss...

Kim said...

Hilarious! And sooo soooo true! I can identify with so many of those definitions...wait what was I saying?! :P

Courtney D said...

I hope it's okay that I borrowed #2... properly cited, of course!
You Rock Lady!

Dirty Mouth said...

fragmomtation and kidsponder go together.